Sunday 30 January 2011

One of 'those' moods

This one probably won't be a fun read, but I feel compelled to just sit here and pour out all the bile that I've been thinking about in the last few hours. I tend to get like this when I know I have to be up at 8am and it's just gone 5am and I'm still sitting at my laptop, unable to summon up enought energy to sleep.

My ultimate question is:
What is the sodding point?

I mean, I'm sitting here, counting down the days until I have to leave university and life will SUCK. I'll have to find a job, something that my skills will make strictly limited. I'm either with a bar job for the rest of my life or finding some bullshit 9-to-5 office job where the dress code doesn't account for ties (yeah, right), since the chances of me actually making it as a writer are somewhere in the microscopic region.

To be fair, I shouldn't say that life ahead will definately suck more than now, now is doing a fair job of sucking. It seems like every week I get sent another letter from some other fucker demanding money from me (the Student Loans Company, the University, the Council, the Door System people, the fucking homeless guy on the corner) and they all seem to think that I'm the cure for their financial woes.

I'm constantly edgy, I seem to have lost all my sense of fun, I keep accidently loading on more and more responsibility upon myself and I just don't seem to give a fuck about all the things that I used to enjoy.

I had a falling out with a friend a little while ago about the nature of children. Now, I won't go too far into it, but there was the potential there for us not just to be friends, but she really, really wants kids and has it arranged to be a mother soon (I'm not really sure of the specifics). Now, despite all my reservations about children anyway, the one thing that keeps knocking itself into the back of my head is this:

Why would anyone want to bring a kid into this world? There are stabbings in the news every few days, the banks are drowning in their own incompetence, our governments are slowly revealing that they are, in fact, pantomime villians, unemployment is at an all-time high, coupled with national depression and suicide rates. And the best part is that nobody seems to give a shit, you know? People just keep their heads down.

And why shouldn't they? Who honestly wants to look around outside and think... 'yep, I can dig it'. Who's life is so financially secure that they think they can support someone else? I'm not having a go at parents, really, because I don't understand their situations and I hope I never will.

I think about the burden that I am on my parents. I look at the amount of money my dad has calculated that I owe him for the house I'm now sitting in. It's a fair amount. I'll never be able to pay it back to him. Simple as that, I will never be able to afford my own home. I'm living off his charity.

So why the fuck do we bother?

What the fuck is the point?

But then, this was all started as a 'pointless exercise', wasn't it. So, why don't you, my apparent 8 followers, let me know. What the hell is the point of all this crap? And ask yourself if I'm really in right mindset to do a film review right now?

THE MECHANIC.

Yeeeaaahhh....Nah. Not that good. I feel that ol' reliable, Jason Statham, has been a bit of let down ever since the Expendables, but then I'm trying to think of good stuff that he's done other than Snatch and Crank. Hmm... imdb time...

However, this is a remake of a 70's Charles Bronson movie about an assassin who works freelance for a secretive government agency and takes on an apprentice due to the guilt of his most recent job. The apprentice is the son of his last mark.

Now, I like me some Jason Statham. I loves me some Ben Foster. Hell, Tony Goldwyn was in this movie and I like me some Tony Goldwyn as well. Know what's even better? No romantic subplot, no female lead character. Even sodding better.

It's just that it's dull.

Don't get me wrong, it's nice to see some of the work that goes into these assassinations, the preperations, the weapons, the delicate precision, but the entire movie was carried with an apparent lack of pace that made it simply uninteresting to watch. While I'm fine with the concept, there was something severely lacking in the execution of this movie.

That's all there is to it, really. Just sloppy camera-work, pacing, tension, characters. It was all kind of flat, sort of like a bland comic book, rather than a movie about hitmen. And lets face it, we all love us some hitmen, despite that we have an overly romanticised view of them, along with so many other bloody things. So yeah, not so good, really.

Next: True Grit.

Saturday 15 January 2011

Ageing Day

So today I turn 27. I'm old. Whoo-hoo.










.... Yep, that's all I got on that subject.

BLACK SWAN.

Right, so this is probably one of the most hotly discussed movies to be coming out around now, which is actually not saying much, considering the august company it is standing in for this year's Oscar Season. King's Speech, 127 Hours, The Fighter, True Grit, a bunch of others. But that being said, all of these things lack one critical element.

Only Black Swan is directed by Darren Aronofsky. This is *the* Darren Aronofsky, the man who brought us Requiem for a Dream, Pi, Below and The Fountain. This man is the king of messed up cinema, a legacy of films following after him that have their audiances scratching their heads and brutally supressing all the memories at the same time.

Believe it or not, that's actually something to be proud of. This guy's career is so brilliant that a movie about a broken down wrestler (The Wrestler, an unbelievable character piece that didn't get the recognition it deserved), is actually the curve-ball in his line-up of work.

The other reason that The Wrestler is a curve-ball is because the characters are warm and empathic, easy to identify with, which isn't the case with most of Aronofsky's films, especially Black Swan. This is a film about distant and cold people orbiting each other without interacting.

Basically, the film is abotu a young girl slowly going through a mental breakdown when her perfectionism at her chosen craft, Ballet, pushes her beyond her normal limits and she goes for her chance at the title role. It could probably be said in a slightly less complicated manner than that.

Girl. Mental breakdown. Goes for the big shot. Freaky body horror. Girl on Girl. Bizarre twisting reality.

Oh yes, this film pretty much has it all, beautiful set pieces and parrallels to the story of Swan Lake itself.

My only concern is that this may be too much for a 15-Rating. It's not explicitly gory or horrifying, but I found the subject matter to be too heavy for the rating it was given. I know that it certainly resonated deeply within me, so I'm not sure that teenagers should be taking it on. Maybe that's just me being greedy, however, not wanting to share it. Because it's just that good. Actually no, it's just that mind-blowingly great.

I don't think it's quite the equal of 127 Hours for sheer power, but it's underlying insidious horror is masterful. Well worth it.

Next up: The Mechanic.

Tuesday 11 January 2011

What's the point?

Seriously? 1 hour? That's it? This week, my class time has been reduced to 1 hour. 1 measly hour. With Mike off ill and Sara having cancelled her wednesday class last week, that gave us 1 hour in uni and that was yesterday. And I pay £3,000 a year for this? Wonderful, I tell you, just wonderful. I might as well have not bothered getting out of bed at all.

I heard somewhere that I'd have to pay an additional £500 for every extra class that I wanted to sit in on (and there are two on a thursday that I do). Now, considering just how much actual class time I actually seem to get, if anyone tries to actually charge me for this, then they can quite frankly make out with my overly rounded backside, the pedantic pissants.

Money problems seem to be a recurring theme in my life at the moment. The Student Loans Company insists that I owe them about £2000, the University is cancelling my Bursary and the Council keeps badgering me about Council Tax that I don't actually owe them. It gets a bit much.

Is it just me or am I
getting more annoyed?

The Council stuff is easy to sort, I'm just kinda surprised that it hasn't been done already automatically, it's not like I didn't register or enroll. I just need to get the uni to send off a form on my behalf, but the fact that this keeps cropping up has me concerned for my tennants.

Not that they really deserve that much of my concern. Anthony's good company and we'll always have a chat, but he isn't big on communal tidying. Richard really, really, *really* isn't big on keeping anything clean. I don't think he's ever even washed a dish while he's been living here.

God damn I miss Sabeen.

Right... THE KING'S SPEECH.

When my parents saw this film (about a week before I did), in their cinema in St Andrews, the movie recieved standing applause at the conclusion. It didn't quite get the same treatment from moviegoers in Southampton Cineworld, but as far as I'm concerned, it sodding well deserved it.

I also saw that MovieBob thinks this film is simply Oscar Bait. Now, he makes fair points, it's got all the trappings of an Oscar lure, but I really don't think that makes a difference to just how damned good this film was. I mean seriously heartwarming, seriously well played, seriously good.

There's not too much I can say about it, really. It tells the story of how Prince Albert, who would go on to become King George VI (dad of Queen Elizabeth II), tried with great difficulty to overcome his crippling speech impediment, which would be vital for the coming years, with the build up to the Second World War in progress. It's a much bigger issue than it might appear, at least for Albert, who has spent his life in the shadow of his much grander family and their harsh 'old-school' ways.

The friendship between Bertie and Lionel is touching and rocky and taps into the class struggle that Oscar loves and people just seem to empathise with.

The performances by Rush, Firth, Bonham-Carter, Gambon, Jacobi and Pearce are simply brilliant, they fully capture Britian in the late 1930's and are truly moving.

Basically, this film may have been designed in order to hook the producers some Oscars... but it deserves everything that it catches. Because it simply is that good.

Next up: Black Swan.

Sunday 9 January 2011

MANuary

You know, having this beard has been kinda cool. I don't have to worry about shaving, people make amused comments which gives me something to talk about with them and it's ginger. I mean, that's just classic.

But I think that it has run its course. I look in the mirror now and it doesn't amuse me anymore, it just looks kinda silly. Of course, you ask, what about my democratic process? What about the people that did the voting?

The reason I held the voting process at the end of November and December was because I couldn't really make a choice myself. I had no strong opinion either way, so therefore I asked my friends what they thought and we all had a laugh about it. Now... now I have an opinion. I think I want my chin back. I may never have been a good looking guy, but I did always find myself armed with a little more confidence when it was just manly sandpaper stubble.

So, no beard. Soon. Ish.

In other news, my attempts at eating better and doing more exercise appear to be lasting about as long as the average New Year's resolution, which is about 2 weeks. Ish. Sort of. Maybe. I'm sure I'll be able to stick to some of it, but it's expensive and annoying and it just isn't me, really.

I've always had this saying: Eat Healthy, Exercise Regularly, Die Anyway. Now, call me a black-hearted cynic, but that's generally how I look at life. If you look around, the world is pretty crap, so there's not much incentive for me to stick around after the years where I can look after myself.

Especially since I don't intend on having kids. But that's a sore point for some, so I'll leave that topic. I also seemed to have attracted several new followers, although why is yet to be seen and whether they'll actually stick around is another matter entirely. So yes, Hi... whoever you are.

Ahm... yeah, that's it.

127 HOURS.

Oh. My.
Shitting.
Christ.

This was one hell of a film to start the year off with. I know I saw Love and Other Drugs just before this, but this movies just blows it out the water. It blows most things out the water, from other movies to aircraft carriers. This film has such passion, such paranoia, pain, power, precision and about eighteen other p-words to go with it, that it's pretty much just perfect.

For those that don't know, 127 Hours is the amount of time that Aron Ralston, a mountaineering enthusiast, spent trapped with his arm pinned to a rock wall deep in the middle of nowhere, Utah. He had very little water, very little food and virtually nothing that he could use to get himself out of that situation. This is how he survived, and it isn't pretty.

Chances are most people have heard the various press about this film, that it's probably gorier than Saw and that two people had to be removed on stretchers with oxygen support at the premier. Well, you know what they say, no such thing as bad publicity.

The acting is unbelievable, James Franco will be up for some serious awards in a few weeks, the location is gorgeous, you really can tell why Ralston spent so much time in that part of the world, it's truly incredible, the soundtrack is perfectly chaotic.

But the real star of the show is Danny Boyle's Editor, Jon Harris. Quite frankly, the way this film is cut together is the most harrowing part of it, the way the messed up reality of what's going through Aron's delusional head is brought to life in a way that's both heartbreaking and seriously unnerving. This is probably Danny Boyle's finest film and that's coming from a long pedigree of seriously good films.

Of course, the most spectacular thing about this movie is that it's a true story. Aron Ralston is a real person, this actually happened to him. I'd just like to end on the note that (other than you must see this movie), Mr. Ralston, I'm sure you've heard this before, but I must say that you don't embody the spirit of human triumph, you *are* the spirit of human triumph and a true inspiration to the world full of people who do sod all with their lives. My hat goes off to you, sir. In my left hand, naturally.

Next up: THE KING'S SPEECH

Friday 7 January 2011

Films of 2010

So it's 2011 and I managed to uphold true blue democracy by setting my beard to the vote. But I'm not gonna talk about that, or my New Years Celebrations or my latest ideas or whatever. I'm gonna talk about the films of 2010, that I spent half my time reviewing.

(This may be a long one.)

So, the year was off to a good start with some quirky, fast-paced, kick-ass action films, Sherlock Holmes was hilarious and tense, Daybreakers was a few knocks off being truly brilliant, Book of Eli was very entertaining. Then The Road and Up In The Air took 2010 into a more questioning route, a more thoughtful direction of depression and how to cope with it. And all that was just in January, what a month to start off.

What came next was... well... The Wolfman was pretty poor, the Lovely Bones was uninspiring and The Crazies was pretty run-of-the-mill, leaving February a little disappointing. The only film from March was Shutter Island, a film I'm still mixed about given the ending. April started off terrible, with the Clash of the Titans remake (beware the threatened sequel), but was redeemed by How To Train Your Dragon and of course, Iron Man 2.

A mix in May, the Nightmare on Elm Street remake was pure rubbish, Hot Tub Time Machine and Prince of Persia did little to impress, but Robin Hood was a decent addition and of course, Four Lions was dominating the British market, deservedly so. June brought more mix, Brooklyn's Finest was fine, Bad Lieutenant was downright weird, 4.3.2.1 was surprisingly great, Wild Target sucked beyond all my fears and Get Him To The Greek didn't.

Properly into summer now. July was filled with cool, with Predators, Inception and the A-Team all in the same month. Now that was some good times! Then August followed with the surprisingly cool Piranha, the oddly let-down of Scott Pilgrim and the inexcusably terrible Expendables. September looked as if it would suck to start as well with the new Resident Evil, but Ben Affleck (of all the people) pulled it back with The Town. Cyrus was... well... I still don't know.

October, a month of nostalgia. Back To The Future was 25, Metropolis was 83... both of them reminded me why I should still respect them both for their sheer genius. Then there was Let Me In and RED, both of them were solid movies, and then of course, The Social Network, a film that nobody really saw coming, yet took us all by surprise.

End of the year and Fantasy starts to take over. The Owls of Ga'hoole was passable and good (if violent) for kids, Skyline was utter utter rubbish and Machete was hilarious (and definately not for kids!), in November. Then Unstoppable was solid, Monsters was a bit of a let down and my year was finished with good ol' Narnia. And that was forty two films.

So...

Top Five are easily:
- Inception
- The Social Network
- Four Lions
- The Road
- Iron Man 2

with Up In The Air not that far behind and 4.3.2.1 just a few inches behind that. It was a powerful year in some places, with only a few glaring let downs. I didn't get to see all the films I wanted to. Splice passed me by, as did Toy Story 3 and Kick-Ass. But I think I did pretty damn well as it was. I got me some good movies in. In case you were wondering, that adds up to:

Remakes - 8
(The WOlfman, The Crazies, Clash of the Titans, Nightmare on Elm Street, Prince of Persia, Bad Lieutenant, Piranha and Let Me In)

Sequels - 3
(Get Him To The Greek, Predators. Iron Man 2 and Resident Evil 4 are both half sequels, half adaptations)

Adaptations - 16
(Sherlock Holmes, The Road, Up In The Air, The Lovely Bones, Shutter Island, How To Train Your Dragon, The A-Team, Scott Pilgrin vs. The World, The Town, Metropolis, The Social Network, RED, Legend of the Guardians, Machete and Chronicles of Narnia, as well as the Iron Man 2/Resident Evil 4 thing).

Original (Big Question Mark next to some) - 15
(Daybreakers, Book of Eli, Four Lions, Hot Tub Time Machine, Robin Hood, Brooklyn's Finest, 4.3.2.1, Wild Target, Inception, The Expendables, Cyrus, Back To The Future, Skyline, Unstoppable and Monsters)

Worst Films of the Year:
- Clash of the Titans (Easily the worst)
- Skyline (Beyond Hope)
- The Expendables (Jesus help me)
- Wild Target (Why guys, just why?)

Think that's about as much as I can waffle about the same 42 movies... now I guess I should review another one...

LOVE AND OTHER DRUGS.

Odd film to start the year off with, but I didn't get to see it before Christmas and I didn't want to miss it, especially since it seemed like a romantic comedy that I might actually be interested in. That sentence in itself should probably tell you something about me.

I mean, take a look at the list of forty-two movies I saw this year just gone and try to pick out the romantic comedies. I guarantee you it'll be a very short list. So when one that actually has some interest attached to it... well, can't really pass it up, can I? No, I can't.

So, Edward Zwick.

Zwick is the second port of call when it comes to historical epics, right behind SIR Ridely, after all. What with The Last Samurai, Glory, Blood Diamond and Defiance under his belt, as well as a host of other films. Doing this rom-com almost seems out of place for him, until you consider it. It's set in 1996, a historical period as far as we're concerned now, and it's pretty long, making it somewhat epic in scope.

And truth be told, it's nowhere near as 'romantic' as a lot of other rom-coms aim for. It's hard to watch in some places, it's based around casual sex and it's got enough cynicsm about love and life to fill a whole clone of me. It's genuinely funny in a good number of places and it's got excellent, well-rounded characters. The best of which aren't Gyllenhall and Hathaway (although they are good), it's the support guys.

Oliver Platt and Hank Azaria are probably two of the most under-rated actors on the American scene, their characters in this movie are charming, bitter, hilarious and understated. Team them up with Josh Gad's younger brother character and this movie has a hat-trick of decent male secondaries. Very few female presences apart from Hathaway, however. And the backdrop of the film is the most interesting character of all.

Late 90's. Drug Reps. Viagra.

Oh yes. This is what it's all about. The depiction of the late 90's Viagra boom is probably the most interesting part of the entire film, the sort of historical (eek, that makes me feel old) event that changed a great deal without all that many people noticing and it's documented very, very well.

So, interesting setting, great supporting characters, leads we can actually identify with and a huge wealth of detail in this movie. This isn't just a rom-com, to partake of Mark's and Spencer's advertising campaign. This is an Edward Zwick rom-com. And that says it all, as far as I'm concerned.

Next: 127 Hours.